Final stats

Because scientists love numbers:

Days at work: 41

Hours work: about 400 (396) including travel and overnights

Total pay: $2,400

Pay per hour: $6.00

Sites worked:

· PKS 176

· PKS 182

· PKS 184

· PKS 220

· PKS 252

· PKS 260

· NC Aquarium

· Morris Landing (near Topsail, NC)

· Jones Island (near Swansboro)

· Hatteras Island

Number of seines: app. 50

Fykes: app. 50

Species caught, ID’d: upwards of 4,000

Lab crew:

· Rachel Gittman – pHd candidate

· Michael Prakfa – undergrad at UNC

· Jane Lee – UNC graduate

· Diana Roycroft

Favorite site: Jones Island

Least favorite: Morris Landing

Favorite fish: mummichog

Least favorite: pinfish

The end.

Early wake up. It’s the last day. 8 weeks ago I was up and going, nervous and excited. This morning, the long hours and demanding routine caught up with me. I am pretty exhausted! Work at 7am because I wouldn’t be allowed to leave without one more day of field work. Rachel decided to take us to Morris Landing to do vegetation. So we got an early start to avoid high tide. Thankfully it was a bit overcast so the heat didn’t take over right away. It was weird to be out and know that I wasn’t going to get wet. Today was devoted solely to plants. Vegetation sampling involves working along transects. We basically run 12 meter lines along the coast, from water to upland. On the transect we pick three locations where we drop 1 meter quadrats. We then record percent cover for each plant, count stems, and measure heights. After 3 transects, the task becomes monotonous and quite dull. But it is a very important part of the research. The easy quadrats are the ones we measure in the water and on sand. But the upland quadrats are usually in some pretty thick plants……lots of tall grasses and my favorite, Juncus (terrible…..it could poke your eye out). We were making good progress until we saw a dark cloud moving towards us. No way! The one day in 8 weeks that it was going to rain. And I wasn’t even supposed to be out in the field. Sure enough we got rain. It poured. We worked on, until the thunder started. I couldn’t believe it. Karma. We finished 2/3 of the task and then hopped in the van to eat and stay out of the storm. Well it didn’t pass over so we left. Done.

Back at the lab we unloaded and then I realized it was over. I was really finished. I feel bad now realizing how much more work they are going to have to do. Fish sampling will continue each month until October. The whole process will start again in the spring. So I have only been a part of a small blip in the whole project. It’s nice to know that I was able to contribute a lot of time to her work and I am certainly looking forward to the final results. I don’t’ anticipate the paper being completed for another year and a half. Probably just around the time I am going to be graduating!

All in all I am really happy with my decision to intern at the lab. It was a very rewarding experience and I learned a lot not just about science, but about everyday things - from cooking on my own, to driving a truck, to conducting personal research, to organizing a group of people to work together. I feel like I have grown up a lot this summer and got a great look into post-grad life. I can’t say right now what I want to do for sure after graduation. I am thinking that a career in the sciences is probably not going to be a top choice. I can’t say that I can see myself doing what I did this summer for the rest of my life. But that in no way means that this summer was for nothing. It was perhaps even more important to participate in a unique opportunity so I know what else is out there in the world and see for myself how such an operation is conducted.

Many thanks to Rachel Gittman and the Peterson lab for accepting me as an intern.

easing into closure

Last minute changes in our schedule called for today as my final day in the lab. It was also my final day with Michael around before he headed to New York city. The day was spent doing tasks in the wet lab facility and staying dry! I organized and cleaned, counted frozen shrimp, and tried to ID all of our frozen unknown fish species. It was a nice change of pace and not too repetitive. I also was able to enjoy hanging out in the lab with the other technicians because we were each doing our own tasks….and we finally had a means of playing an ipod, which meant legit music without skipping. The highlight of the day however was our lunch break. The lab treated me to lunch at one of my favorite restaurants, El Zarape. We had about 10 people go and feast compared to our typical lunch breaks. So so good.

Family arrived today. It’s finally hitting me that my time here on the Crystal Coast is at an end.

A Natural Farewell

Today’s sampling trip was to, the recently voted team favorite site, Jones Island. We headed out this afternoon, stopping at Subway first of course!

With the boat fully loaded, we sped off towards the island. Business as usual. By mid afternoon we were working the sites. Thank goodness we didn’t have any plants or transects to run!!!!! This meant that all the technicians were working on fish sampling. It was hot hot hot!!! But the fun began. We hardly caught any fish and completed the process by 5 pm (record speed). It was an emotional closure for me! My last seining procedure and my last fyke net set. I’ve had my mind set forward for so long that the end finally caught up with me and it was quite a surprise.

Delicious picnic dinner at our favorite picnic tables, Frisbee triangles, lounging, and gin rummy (our favorite card game)! Finally the time dwindled to 10:30 and we could set out nets by the light of a full moon.

It was a rough 6 hours of sleep, if I got anywhere near that at all. We were up by 4:30 am to retrieve nets….my last fyke retrieval and last time up so early for a long time!!!! BUGS!!!!! Little terrorists! Because there was no wind out, they attacked in number. The ringleaders were nouseeums. As Michael said “It feels like I am on crack.” We were constantly yelling, slapping, and itching….while attempting to count fish. Not a very enjoyable last experience. But once again we didn’t catch very many fish. By 6:00 am our boat was loaded and we were preparing to head back to the mainland. Very quick! The sun started coming up over the horizon and it was breathtaking. A gorgeous natural farewell to my field work. And then as we pulled away from shore, dolphins jumped around our boat. Its almost as if I am being persuaded to stick around haha.

Clean up. Home. Two more days.

TEAM

Nothing could have prepared me for the beast of a week I just finished. And to be honest, I am still finding it hard to believe that I survived the ordeal. But I found it very rewarding to push myself to the limits. I was pleasantly surprised to see how far I could go.

Day 1: Roadtrip to a new destination…..Morris Landing. Continuing my tour of the east coast, we left the lab around 11am and drove an hour and a half south to the Topsail beach area. There is a Natural Reserve that Rachel is now using for her research. After a car ride of studying GRE vocabulary, we drove to the end of the road that literally dumped right into the sound… welcome to Morris Landing. All that exists at this site is a boat ramp and a wooden pier (small). Picnic lunch complete with our famous watermelon snack. Work begins: Michael and I started seining. I took one step into the sound and sunk to my ankles…..hello mud. It was a joke….literally I laughed at how ridiculous it was. Every step meant sinking. Probably the worst nightmare for my knee…plant and twist. Finally we got the seine set and started walking. Hello wind. The wind inflated the net and tried to send it flying like a kite. So with strong wind, currents, and sinking mud, we started walking. Hello fish. Lots of fish. A new species….bay anchovies. Fun fact- they die pretty much instantly out of the water. The process was sooo slloowww. The wind meant I had to hand weigh everything. I sat on a bucket cramming fish into ziplock bags and hanging them on hand held scales. An hour and a half later we finished our first site….5 to go!!!! By 4 pm we were done with 2 sites and the tide was coming in really fast. (that was 3 hours later). Frustration set in as Rachel was clearly getting annoyed at how long we were taking. Michael and I kept our cool and pushed on. Eventually we ended up bagging all the shrimp to weigh/measure later. Finally at 7 we finished. A sloppy miracle. Very very tiring and mentally draining. We headed to Surf city to grab some dinner. Ended up at an Italian place and had some yummy pizza. Trust me, we ate as slow as possible to stall getting back to the Landing.

We set up tents next to a pile of oysters. It was a joke thinking we were going to sleep there but the tents were great for anti-mosquito protection. The bugs were terrible! So we huddled in the tent, eating hot tamales and playing catch phrase and cards to kill some time. The temperature in the tent reached upwards of 90 degrees. Finally at 1 am we got back to work pulling in the fyke nets. We set up a little camp station where Jane and I counted and measured fish. Yay for having actual chairs. But the lantern attracted some crazy insects. Michael and Rachel had a run in with two pairs of yellow eyes in the marsh (and some crazy sounds). We believe that they were a pair of foxes. Sort, measure, count, bag, weigh, repeat. 2 am ….. 2:30 am….3 am…..3:30 am done. Throw everything in the van. Start driving. Make the car 60 degrees to keep Rachel awake. Try not to fall asleep. In and out of conscious. 5 am back at the lab. Just want to get home.

6am shower, snack, bed time.

10am force myself to wake up

spend the day exerting minimal energy

amazing night of sleep

Day 3: pack up the truck. Roll out after lunch. Destination SOBX. (forgot our pastries in the lab….terrible). THe whole trip takes about 5-6 hours….sitting in the car, sitting in line, sitting on the ferry. A lot of sitting and waiting. And trying to stay as cool as possible. Heat indexes around 100. I finished re-reading the 7^th Harry Potter book as my entertainment. We had a nice dinner in Ocracoke before waiting out a long ferry line to Hatteras. Lots and lots of people in the OBX this weekend. Stocked up at the grocery and finally reached our lab house.

Day 4: I made everyone cinnamon roles for our pre-work breakfast. Then we went to the marina and met up with our boat guy – Jim. He is awesome!!! Jim hauls our equipment across the channel and tells us stories about fishing. The routine began. Well the seining was quick because we hardly caught anything! Literally ZERO fish in one of the nets. Otherwise it was pretty much just handfulls. The heat was definitely the worst this whole summer. I think that my experience at camp really has helped me learn how to cope with heat. I know it was hot. But I adjusted and really didn’t have a big problem with it. I just accept what its going to be like and try not to think about it. So my resilience to the heat made me maintain a good level of energy. You could definitely tell everyone was slowing down though. By noon especially. Unfortunately, the vegetation sampling was taking a while. We had to break for lunch because there was no way we could keep going. No shade. And the bugs were terrible because we lost the wind. MY escape was my Yummy PBJ. The problem now was that we had planned to be done. Hence I did not have my sunscreen. It reached the point where we could feel out skin burning. This resulted in very creative wraps. Rachel was walking around in a towel cape, I tied my rash guard across my shoulders and into my sunglasses to shade my nose. Still 6 more transects of vegetation to go. Hoorah! The water was boiling. Easily hot tub worthy. Everything was stagnant. Michael and I were counting plants. He climbed through some pretty crazy shrubs that could have easily poked out eyes. It was 2 pm now. We were all starting to daze…heat exhaustion and dehydration setting in. But somehow we finished.

AMAZING shower. Sat on the couch and didn’t move for like 2 hours. The interns drove down to Buxton and ate dinner at a Grille. I had ½ pound of boiled shrimp and veggies. Man it hit the spot. I love it when you have the perfect meal.

7:00pm. Time to break out the canoe and paddle ourselves back to our site. Set the fyke nets. And I ended up sitting inside one of the fyke nets haha.

9:00pm Bed

1:30 am awake. Already. Geeze. Canoe again. Still. MOSQUITOS. No wind.

It’s all really a blur now. But Thank goodness the process only took us a little over an hour. A miracle really because it has taken use upwards of 4 hours. But our catch numbers were low. It is a but discouraging to realize that all of the driving, unloading, set up, etc… involved for the Hatteras site only ends up in us catching a very small amount of fish. The same occurred last time. I know it’s part of the research…..but sometimes I question the rationality.

4 am bed…..can’t fall asleep. 6 am finally asleep. 7 am awake again

back to the site. Pack up all the gear. Pile it in the truck. Head to the ferry. The whole island decided to take the 9 am ferry. We spent over an hour sitting in the same spot in line. Finally on the ferry. The ferry almost got stuck on a sandbar. I can only imagine……..

12:30 ferry to Cedar Island. A very long 2 hours. Drive back to the lab.

5:00 pm Home.

Tired yet of reading this. I would be. It might seem like a downer but I really wanted to show the rigor of the job. This was a hard week. But I know that in a few months I will look back and laugh at how ridiculous it was but also how accomplished I feel. THe best thing about this week was that I feel like our lab got a lot closer. We have really reached the level of a team. We work well together and have a good time. We no longer talk just about work but about other more personal things. We play games, laugh a lot, make fun of each other, do ridiculous things, and share some pretty incredible memories. We each have our highs and lows. But in the end, I think we have bonded really well. Fun fact: I have been awake and working with the people in my lab at every hour of the day. 5 am to 4am. We have seen each other in a very raw and real environment. It doesn’t get much more true than that.

Only 4 more days left. Hard to believe it has been 8 weeks.

Time capsule

Wednesday

Done.

I survived 4 overnights unscathed and still in one piece. My body is aching now from hauling and lack of sleep. But the sense of accomplishment is overpowering. Two major rewards today: 1. A large flounder that we caught and 2. Panera breakfast greeting us when we finished counting fish at 7:30am. Best bacon, egg, and cheese ever!!! Consensus on the flounder was dinner. So with a background of rain and thunder, I spent the day napping and relaxing before heading over to Rachel’s house in Beaufort. The flounder was now covered in onions, lemon, and was baked. Haha owell. We ended up having quite a feast with the lab gang. A great gathering

….actually our first outside of work. Learned a lot about everyone I work with and realized that we haven’t really gotten to know each other. Yay group bonding!

First full night’s sleep in ag

es. AMAZING!!!!!

Thursday:

Chill day in the lab. I tackled data entry and powered through it for the whole day. Thank you ipod.

Went and saw the Morehead city Marlins play baseball with some of the other interns. Being social! It was nice to be enjoying something that the locals were involved with. Lots of families and diehard fans. Altho

ugh I really dislike baseball and find it incredibly boring, it was a great activity just to sit and watch effortlessly during a beautiful sunset.

Friday: Day off = beach all day long. Really I have only had a handful of these this whole summer. I decided to stay dry and spend the day reading….The Little Prince and a quick reread of the 7^th Harry Potter. I watched a poor stingray get tortured by a kid who somehow caught him in his thrownet. But I decided not to intervene. Dinner at my favorite PKS spot….the Ramada. Movie night….Sweet Home Alabama…..chick flick, I know but it’s a classic.

Saturday:

Turned out to be a surprise day for me!!!!! Laura’s parents were in town so I headed to Camp Seagull with the whole group. We planned to tour the camp and go out on a motorboat. Well, surprise surprise, the afternoon storm rolled in. But we stuck it out.

THe fact that I drove my car onto CSG’s grounds was crazy. After my 7 years in the Camp family, I had never accomplished this. To be honest, I’d only been to Seagull for 4^th of July (6 times), for golf team, for racing team, for tower team, for staff dinner, fireball carnival, and maybe that’s all. It’s sacred grounds from the perspective of a CSF camper. But in one day I drove through the gates, checked out the main office, and walked around camp like I owned the place haha. Thanks to having two Seagull counselors with us, and the lax rules we were able to roam. The boys were stuck in their cabins but unlike rainy days at Seafarer, they were out running around their cabins, no shoes, no shirts. Literally a little boys’ dream. It was the first time I got an outside glimpse of how things really operate there. It’s amazing how different the two camps really are. I also go to walk through the sacred sailloft and motor repair, and the racing room. All home to the infamous Seagull sea program. Its really overpowering to walk down to the dock and see the enormity of their program. 60 sunfish, 5 hobies, 12 lightnings, lasers, 30 boston whalers, outboards, etc….very impressive. But I was astonished at how clean and organized everything was. Really neat….to the t. Walking around the loft brought back memories from the 2004 summer when I was on racing team. 14 years old, nervous about racing with boys, I had been at the loft preparing for a day of racing. Little blips popped in my mind all day. I read the list of camper champions names for sailing seeing names of campers that had been central to cabin drama, old Johnny Seagulls, sailing, legends…….there it was. My teenage years. CSF and CSG are like time capsules. Passing the mess hall, I remember running through it for golf team, singing to the boys. Or the time I ran into Matt Sims running across the soccer field after 4^th of July.

I was at Seagull for an hour or so. It was raining as I said before. Everyone was supposed to be in their cabins. I was standing at

the mess hall. A figure runs towards me, counselor. Closer Closer. No way. It’s Lambert. You have to be joking. Literally, the one Seagull counselor I knew was at camp. Just so happened to be on his way to his cabin. And just so happened to run into me. Camp is a weird place.

I am so so so happy to be a part of the Camp family. It’s a magical place.

We ventured to CSF to give the girl’s camp tour. Every time I drive through the gates I am overwhelmed with a since of fun, of energy, of personality, of character, of me. I feel like I am truly myself. I always have the urge to yell, to sing, to give hugs, to smile. As the front sign reads….”future leaders of the world at play.”

And we made it just in time to take out an outboard. A rare treat to go out on a motorboat. A blast of a ride though. Since acti

vity period ended, we decided to head out of camp. Also, an infamous dark cloud was rolling in. 5:40 girls outside on the porches, shaving, and pizza boxes out back. Cookout and dance!!!

We drove to New Bern and enjoyed a delicious dinner downtown followed by an evening of pool and games at their hotel. I had a wonderful time. Best part about it, was that the whole day was unplanned. I didn’t have to worry about any logistics. I simply went with the flow. And things worked out. Lovely.

As you leave the gates of camp a sigh reads, Come back and play with us. I think to myself, when will I be back. I always come back. But what will the circumstances be. I hope nothing changes. My time capsule. So real, so alive.

Blue lights and silhouettes

I walked into the marsh around 4 am and was about to retrieve a net. I looked down and saw that as I moved around, tiny blue fluorescent lights flashed in the water. I waved my hand through the water and little blue sparkles would shine. I stopped moving, looked up and for the first time recognized the beauty of the early morning in a marsh. Everything is still. The water hardly ripples, an occasional fish leaps out of the water, the bugs sing in harmony. And out into the horizon, a deep blue light escapes from the darkness. Stillness. I breath a sigh of relief and completely relax. Meanwhile my other lab partner is stressing about walking through oysters and completing the job. All of a sudden I become one with the marsh. I feel apart of its being. No fear. No rush, Just slow movements. The blue flashes continue and the I see blue sparkles that outline a jellyfish. I realize that they are the lights of ctenophores, basically moon jellies. So cool. Mother nature always puts beauty in your path. Whether or not you take a moment to see it and appreciate it is another story. I then looked up and saw my partner completely silhouetted with the fyke net we were about to retrieve on a background of orange, purple, and pink as the sun slowly edged its way up the sky. The sun was awakening life in the marsh. Birds starting moving around, the fish were splashing, and I continued to move with the marsh, hoping that I could join in the morning awakening process.

That morning was a very enjoyable one. I relished each moment I spent in the waters. Meanwhile, everyone else continued to move with the quick-to the point motions that I had once been a part of.

Now whenever I am going into the field, whether the sun is setting, or rising, or darkness blankets the sky, I feel a new since of passion and beauty around me. It’s no longer just a job. It is understanding the world around me and its intricacies that most people have never seen at work. I’m the lucky one. But shhh it’s a secret.

11:00 pm. I walk into the marsh, into the warm water, look up, and am surrounded by an infinite field of stars. I wish I could lay back, float, and get lost in nature’s awe. Blue lights and silhouettes.

Smells

I honestly wouldn’t know what day of the week it is if it weren’t for my laptop calendar. I have seen sunrises and sunsets so often this week that everything is blurring together into a continuous timescale. Our marsh stealth operations began on Saturday and have been in motion ever since. Efficiency is key. Michael and I worked the first site together. It has been a different game this go round because we know what we are doing (or at least we think). Rather than having Rachel scope out each site and call the orders, we were simply dropped off and told to proceed as usual. The other big change is that we are now working with only 4 people (no extra hands). Here’s a brief on the activities:

Afternoon

1. Unload supplies (3 buckets, 1 cooler, 2 fyke nets (weighing prob 40-50ibs total), 6 rebar pieces, 4 pvc pipes, 1 tote (with pliers, zip ties, transect tape, gloves, fish net, data tables, mallet, portable bubblers, 1 seine net (20ibs), and our emergency orange box)

2. Set fyke net A measurements: place PVC poles and rebar pieces

3. Set Fyke b

4. Try not to trip on oysters

5. Seine site a

· measure out a distance of 20m

· walk out into the water with the other person

· unroll the net

· measure depth

· and start walking with the net

· hope not to catch too much (esp crabs)

· pull net onto shore (hopefully on a sandy place but sometimes this takes place over a rock jetty coated in oysters)

· still hoping not to fall on oysters

· open up net

· sort out the blue crabs

· put fish in bucket (try not to loose any fish)

6. And repeat for site b

7. Carry fish buckets back to van

8. Back to the lab

9. Sort, measure, weigh all the fish

This is our afternoon routine. Takes about 3 – 4 hours.

Michael and I mastered our first site. It’s all about efficiency and working smarter not harder!

Evening (after 9pm but changes with tides)

1. Back at the site

2. load up on bug spray

3. Red head lamps

4. HIGH TIDE!!! At least waist deep

5. carry fyke nets out into the water and place them in the rebar and PVC pipes set earlier

6. take more measurement

7. Realize that you are walking around in a marsh and its pitch black outside

8. Wonder how you managed to get yourself involved with such an operation

9. celebrate surviving without any oyster wounds

10. Repeat

*30-40minutes

EARLY AM (between 3am and 6am)

1. Hope your alarm goes off

2. Wondering what day it is?

3. good music on the way

4. more bug spray, red lights, and still dark

5. retrieve nets

6. sort crabs and fish again

7. carry buckets back to the van

8. put them in the lab

*1 hour

back to sleep? Or not? That’s the question. Usually back to sleep.

Afternoon

1. Return to the lab and proceed to count, measure, weigh the fish caught in the early morning

2. Back to the sites to retrieve all equipment and move to the new site

Everything starts over. 4-5 days continuous!!

Ok so with that said maybe you can better understand the work. On Sunday we had a large amount of species caught at out site. So I was unexpectedly at work for a straight 7 hours in the afternoon (straight through dinner). Thank goodness for music except that our CD players skips CD’s and the radio doesn’t work. So we end up with some interesting remixes of songs. We listened to the same CD about 3 times that afternoon. Michael and I finished our site in good time but had to carry the weight of counting the other group’s site. SO MANY SHRIMP. It will make you go crazy. These shrimp are tiny, like 2cm and there were hundreds. I walked out of the lab thinking I was still counting shrimp. We started going crazy. Meanwhile I was missing the world cup final! ARG. The one Sunday I had to work this whole summer. If Germany had been playing I would have boycotted. Thank God for DVR!!! I’ve had the worst luck with my teams this year though. It all started with UNC men’s soccer losing the first ACC tournament game (PKS). Then their loss in the NCAA tournament final four (PKS). Then Bayern München losing the UEFA cup. And then the US losing. And then Deutschland losing. Yep. So when I wanted the Netherlands to win, I pretty much jinxed their chances. Well I watched 116 minutes of soccer and was expecting PKS to begin, which comes at no surprise whatsoever. And then it was over. The Spaniards. Of course. And then my DVR stopped in the final minute because the game went into overtime. And I realized that if it had gone into PKS I would have missed them. That would have been EPIC FAIL. So in the end its better that someone scored. Great game though.

SO MANNNNYYYYY FISSHHHHH. We caught Hundreds of mullet. But the catch was, we didn’t count them until the afternoon. Well, most of them died. Guess who spent 3 HOURS standing in front of a container with prob 400 dead fish??? The smell was horrific. By the end, I was down to a soupy mix of blood, guts, salt water, decomposing fish, and floating scales. The smell was so bad I had completely lost my appetite and was really close to giving up. Meanwhile, Michael was sitting next to me measuring the fish. At least 300 of them were mullets. But we had to SORT THE MULLET. And the two species look almost IDENITICAL. You had to count fin spines to tell the difference. After 2 hours we started laughing hysterically thinking that the whole thing was a big joke. Literally all the fish were starting to look the same. It was pretty terrible. It took us over 3 hours to do one net whereas usually we are done with all of them in 2 hours. I will spare you the photo I took of the bucket.

Work continues on.

Growing up

I have always found that the 4^th of July is the peak of summer. Afterwards, the downhill journey to school begins. The anticipation of summer dwindles, perhaps boredom sets in, and thoughts about a new semester come into focus. I have found myself starting to think forwards now. My surgery date is starting to loom in my mind. And I think that the reality of that situation is starting to sink in.

Meanwhile, I am still tryin

g to live in the present and make the most of my final 3 weeks on the coast here. I have finally settled into a routine. Each

day comes and goes more quickly. But my life is in a continuum here. I have watched as the weekly cycle of families come and go. The same process: the large SUV rolls in, the kids run to the condo, the beach stuff is unloaded by the parents, kids sporting their new purchases from wings, the endless grocery bags with popsicles, watermelons, and beer. A new tent is built down on the beach. And so a new territory is claimed by the family. Fishing trips, putt putt, ice cream, souvenir shopping. And there I sit in the same chair week by week watching the show around me. Watching America in action. Observing the ways families interact. Taking notes on a future that I am now seeing coming closer and closer.

The irony is that my job

is far from continuous. Our lab is seemingly the most active and intensive lab in the Institute. This week was a perfect example of work’s chaotic uncertainty. I worked 3 days this week. Tuesday we spent rummaging around the lab, tidying up business and preparing for Wednesday. Slow slow slow….but then, the boat trailer lights wouldn’t work. Note: Nothing is ever easy at work. So we had to d

elay – cancel – no just delay our tr

ip. Wednesday we set out f

or Jones Island again. We spent the day counting plants. Yep. It’s about as bad as it sounds. But I am going to remain optimistic for those of you who are aspiring botanists. We worked through the heat of the day and miraculously finished work by 5. Definitely treated myself to DQ after that one. Thursday we were about to leave for a new location. Rachel calls and says don’t come. Great! Nothing better than having your mind set to do one thing and then having to switch gears 180 degrees. But I made it happen. I cleaned all of our gear. Organized everything for our new sampling trips, mended our nets, and finally finished entering all of our data. How’s that for a productive day. Then we got Friday off. For the first time in weeks I am enjoying a peaceful and quiet beach house. Just me, some new tunes, Stones for Schools, and leftover lasagna. I ventured out to Eclipse last night and was disappointed with the film. Too much focus on the romance, a bit cheesy, and way too much beating around the bush. Not to mention it was a bad choice of a movie when what you are watching mirrors a similar situation in your life. Brilliant D.

But the ocean’s healing powers are helping. Or rather they are simply burring my feelings under a new layer of sand. The ocean is always in motion, always changing, presenting opportunities, and then moving forward whether or not you keep up. It’s an example I need to follow at this point. Just keep going. Keep moving. Don’t get stuck in the past.

Saturday the marathon begins again. Ready or not…..

In Repair

Too many shadows in my room
Too many hours in this midnight
Too many corners in my mind
So much to do to set my heart right
Oh it's taking so long i could be wrong, i could be ready
Oh but if i take my heart's advice
I should assume it's still unsteady
I am in repair, i am in repair

Stood on the corner for a while
To wait for the wind to blow down on me
Hoping it takes with it my old ways
And brings some brand new luck upon me
Oh it's taking so long i could be wrong, i could be ready
Oh but if i take my heart's advice
I should assume it's still unsteady
I am in repair, i am in repair

And now i'm walking in a park
All of the birds they dance below me
Maybe when things turn green again
It will be good to say you know me

Oh it's taking so long i could be wrong, i could be ready
Oh but if i take my heart's advice
I should assume it's still unready
Oh i'm never really ready, i'm never really ready
I'm in repair, i'm not together but i'm getting there

Stepping back and reevaluating. Learning and setting the bar high. But with good intentions. There must be a reason. Just gotta have faith

Americana

I totally expected a chaotic weekend. And that is exactly what I received. Waking up to the sound of bacon sizzling outside my bedroom window and the kids running up the stairs, Grace crying about apples to apples, ben asking me a million questions, the dog barking at my hairdryer, grandma trying to spoil who won the soccer game, Aunt Katie learning how to deal with a 20 year old niece, Eliza wanting to become a sand mermaid, Aunt Rose cooking up all kinds of interesting snacks, Uncle George smoking out the condos with the Green Egg, and Grandpa’s late arrival. Not to mention a fridge so full we had to stuff our faces with peaches and blueberries to fit everything inside.

It was a weekend worthy of a reality show. Being an ocd organized person, I was on the brink of going insane. But somehow I managed to make it through. The girls and I played with their silly bands, made mermaids, looked for mermaid’s gold, and swam in the ocean. Ben and I talked about sports, threw the baseball around, played store, and set off fireworks. I managed to also watch the Germany soccer game in peace and quiet. And discovered the wonders of DVR!!!!! Wow.

The weather the weekend was absolutely perfect. Literally it could not have been better. Mornings and evenings in the 70’s. Cloudless days. Crystal blue and flat ocean. Paradise. And the Island was showing it. I have never in my 10 years coming down here, seen it so packed.

And so another successful 4^th of July came and went. Just for kicks this is a look back at the last 4ths for me:

2002-2005: Camp Seafarer

2006: Cains, Australia

2007: Seafarer counselor

2008: fireworks in Damascus, VA – drove home to P’cola – P’cola bay fireworks

2009: Tetova, Macedonia

2010: Atlantic Beach/Swansboro

For the actual 4^th of july I went to the Kohlmann’s home in Swansboro because my family had to head out early. It was a joint dinner with their neighbor’s the Griffith’s (whose son Scott is also one of Ashley’s friends). So now Ashley says I have officially hijacked her life lol. We had a great feast including my first taste of clams! The boys and I messed around with poppers and smoke bombs, which resulted in us taping smoke bombs to an arrow and shooting them across the yard. See what happens when you are hanging out with military families. We then watched the fireworks from their balcony and ate my dessert. Yes I cooked a dessert for the record. Pineapple Split cake. Delicious. The fireworks were pretty good but Camp’s and P’colas are better. We had a good time though.

A new work cycle is about to start up again. Halfway done. Looking back it has really been great so far. I have really enjoyed my time at the lab and have gotten to do a lot of things I wasn’t expecting. I have also gotten to spend time with family I haven’t seen in awhile and hang with friends. All in all a good summer.

Can’t believe I still have another month to go.

who are you

Fitting:

Just when I had you off my head
Your voice comes thrashing wildly through my quiet bed
[You say you wanna try again]
But I've tried everything but giving in

Why you wanna break my heart again
Why am I gonna let you try

When all we ever do is say goodbye
All we ever do is say goodbye

I bought a ticket on a plane
And by the time it landed, you were gone again
I love you more than songs can say
But I can't keep running after yesterday

We say Goodbye again

Lets cut the time in half once again

You empower me to live each day to the fullest and to be the best I can be

You mean such much to me; I hope you can see it in my eyes

One month of work done

The work week concluded with trips to the Aquarium and to Hoophole to set fiddler crab traps and work on vegetation sampling. I also spent nearly 6 hours typing in data that we have collected. I hereby declare that I will never ever have a job that involves sitting at a computer for 6 hours everyday and typing in data. It was pretty terrible. This is the great thing about internships. You learn what you don’t want to do. That was also the first day since June 1 that I have NOT been out in the field at all during the workday. That’s pretty crazy. But the rest of the work week was pretty slow. Certainly a lull in the action. Friday we had the annual 4^th of July cookout for all of the IMS staff. Apparently they get together twice each year – 4^th of July and Christmas. It was crazy to see everyone together in one place at one time. Probably 50% of the people I had never seen before. Seeing everyone interact, I must admit I am really happy with the lab group I ended up working for. It was also nice to interact with some of the other interns that I see around a lot but never really get to talk to. The food was AMAZING, especially since the desserts were BYO.

As soon as I stuffed my face – I hopped in the car and called it a week. Extended weekend get excited!!!!

Back into another world this evening….

[Our special place]

- written in anticipation

I

A circle of strangers

And pasta by rain

We set out on a journey

Walking in a lane

You were strong and determined

Composed – prepared

I tagged along behind you

As no one else dared

Our life stories intertwined

The further we moved

It was as if we were soaring

with nothing left to prove

II

Connected we were

Living in a dream

That night so dark

We became a team

The thick of your palm

with my naïve hand

Moved along slowly

As we drew in the sand

The beauty of darkness

So no one would tell

We relied on our senses

Touch taste and smell

The sweet perfume

Of a natural being

Your lips held

All that you were feeling

III

That morning came

We knew it would

“we’re going to fill our bottles”

-or so we should

The only bottles we filled

Were of innocent love

We sealed them tightly

And looked above

And then he whispered

“Our special place”

We stood entranced

Face to face

IV

Soap, candy, and goosebumps too

It was time to depart from the crew

The last farewell

Dwindled into the past

I could not help but think

Would it last

The e-mails and phone calls

Continued in suit

Spilling all our lives’ details

to the minute

Then it stopped

The string unraveled

But one still remained

No matter where we traveled

to be continued

The little cabin with a red roof

I think this is the first moment of silence I’ve had in my beach condo for over a week. Very very nice.

Well its July now. Halfway through another year and one month closer to that special day in October. We are just plugging right along now.

Last week was jam packed looking back now on everything that happened. Emotionally I have been to Pluto and am slowly on the way back. Physically, I made it to Mars and back, and mentally, well I am always above the atmosphere (haha wow that made no sense).

So Monday. Work – destination Jones Island. It’s an island in Swansboro that sits in the middle of the sound, owned and managed by the Division of Coastal Management. We took our first boat adventure as a lab group. So great to be out on the water and a gorgeous day for it! The ride was a short one and then we were tasked with dropping our equipment off all over the island in the places we were working. So MJ and I went parading around pulling wagons with nets and PVC pipes trying not to flip the carts over. Our home for the evening was a little cabin with a kitchen and minimal furniture. Not too bad.

The funny thing about this whole situation is that just a few weeks back I was standing on Christian’s dock looking out over the water and noticed a little island in front of their house. Sitting on the island was a little house with a red roof. I asked if anyone lived there and he said he didn’t know.

Well there I was standing on the porch of the house with the red roof looking back at the dock where I had first seen the Island. The world keeps getting smaller.

We spent the evening doing our usual routine. Michael and I set up the fyke net poles and then seine each site. This time we were working with 6 locations (quite a lot of work for 2 people). The wind was also really strong which made it a bit more difficult. Picture me sitting on a bucket with a notebook in my lap, pencil in my right hand, and a scale in my left hand that has a clip on the end with a fish attached to it. Rachel laughed everytime she looked at me. Jane and Rachel were doing sediment work and setting transects. We set the fyke nets around midnight and then went to sleep (sleeping bags, wooden floors, and circles of bugspray to keep the roaches out).5:45 am wake up and pull the nets in, ID, weigh, measure the fish. Michael and I did it all. I learned today that I am truly a morning person compared to most people.

The only thing I was thinking about all day was a friend that I was going to be meeting with later that evening. Time moved incredibly slow and of course, things started to go wrong. I figured inevitably I would get stuck on the island. First our boat was beached because the tide went out more than we anticipated. Thankfully, another boat came to the island and helped us get unstuck. Then, the engine kept cutting out right when we pulled into the channel. Miraculously it decided to work. Then, we realized none of us had ever put a boat on a trailer before so it took us awhile to figure out how to get it off the ramp. Then, we had to clean up all of the fyke nets which is like wrestling with a live animal.

12:30 tired from 2 hours of sleep, lots of work, and anxiety about the day – back to the condo

And then I put myself in a situation that I will never ever forget. I spent the rest of the week in a trance.

CSF is the best place of all

So I made a remark recently saying that I had gotten over my initial sadness about not being at camp this summer. I have finally come to terms with the way thi

ngs worked out. I still wanted to make a trip to camp to visit li

ke I said I would. Today was the day!

I headed down that old familiar road, through the rural countryside to a ferry across the Neuse river. A

s a young kid, this drive was fill

ed with excitement and anticipation as I looked forward to the first day of camp and meeting my cabinmates. Across the Neuse I could make out the peppermint striped sails of the SeaGull sunfish, the boys out enjoying a lovely day at camp. An itching started growing inside me. All I wanted to do was get

out on a sailboat again. I can’t believe it has been nearly 3 years now. I think the last time I was out on a boat was with Lauran stevens on the finally staff sailing evening. Unbelievable.

Life on the Neuse is eternal. Time moves slow and things hardly change. I drove through Arapahoe, past all the American flags, listening to country camp tunes with the windows rolled down. It could have easily been a few years past. You would never know the difference. My mind was racing with images of my camper days.

AHOY THERE welcome to

CAMP SEAFARER

Inside the gate, I drove along the road as if it was a daily routine. I felt like I had just been here yesterday. That’s how it always is. The Camp book begins just where it left off. I felt right at home. It’s a welcoming community to those who grew up inside. A bubble of people who act similary and strive to live by the character traits that the camp is built upon. To outsiders it may seem too regimented, too clickish, too bizarre, too exclusive. But if you can break the surface and the politics of camp, there exists a place that has made me who I am today.

I roamed around, visiting Taylor Lodge to see my old cabin photos, the Chandlery to purchase some new camp items, and towards the sail loft. But I was stopped short when “Diana Roycroft? Hold on” camp blarri

ng from the megaphone at the swim lake. NO way! Katelyn Peret my old co-counselor is UA at the swim lake this year. Wow! So ok things do change. The people are different now. My age group are the girls running camp now. How crazy is that. I remember always looking up to

those counselors as being so intelligent, experienced, and great role models. But now I am their age. We are those counselors. Yikes! And girls I taught sailing are on staff. And my campers are now in camp3 . What! Down at the sail loft I ran into more olf familiar faces and got to hang out at Check out. It was great, I was allowed to roam around as if I were a counselor myself.

I was so surposed at how many people recognized and rmemebered me after nearly 3 years abseince. They even called me by name! There were also several instances where I could palce the face but not the names. For

my own recordkeeping this is who I saw:

Meghan Taminen (UA sailing)

ML (UA sailing)

Stewart (UA sailing)

Allie Hoffman

Sara Frantz

Terra hart

Beth Peters (Aquatics UA)

Katelyn Peret

Leslie Anderson

Paige Derioun

April Pfeiffer

Kristen Benson (led my Sea venture trip)

Lucy Roberts

And…..as I was sitting waiting for lunch, a camper passed me. Is that really her? Maybe? Name????? Come on…..Katie! Yes Katie! My camper from cabin 4.

Left: Cabin 4

Right: Today

"Katie?"

She turns, looks towards me. Walks towards me

“Do you know who I am?”

“No I don’t remember”

“Im Diana, your counselor from cabin 4”

“Oh my gosh, yes. I miss you!”

She gave me a huge hug. I teared up. Literally I almost lost it. It was one of the most amazing feelings I have ever had. TO know that I had touched the life of this girl. And how grown up she was now. Upper camp 2, 12 years old. Wow I feel old. I talked to her for a little while as she sat on my lap and continuously hugged me. Katie Henchel. She gave me a silly band, a sign of true attachment. I will wear it for a long long time.

I know that there are more of my campers around but I didn’t run into any of them. But seeing Katie was enough.

Guess what? WHAT?

We’ve got FRIED CHICK’EN

Yep! It’s fried chicken Sunday lunch today. I sat with Laura Lamar’s C-35 for lunch. Just like the old times. I melded right in. Felt like I had been there all summer already. Blessing, food, bug juice, Sunday hymns, announcements, rest period until 3 O CLOCK, KP.

SAILING time! The moment I have been waiting for for a long time. Life jacket on, daggerboard, Neuse here I come. Same crocks and bathing suit I had as a counselor. Such a strange feeling. I walked right out to the sunfish, rigged it, and set sail as if I sailed yesterday. It came so natural. No need for me to ever be nervous about sailing. It was a beautiful moment. Sailing around the Neuse, alone, looking back at such a beautiful place. Knowing I will always be welcome here. Hoping that camp will be the one place I can always come and know that it will still be there. There are no words to describe the sensation of sailing along the coast of camp. I was extremely relaxed and satisfied with that moment in my life. Essentailly this moment represents what a summer at CSF can do. It reenergizes the soul and the mind and the heart. It gives you strength and confidence to be yourself and to strive to live each day to the fullest. And to be surrounded by people who also energize you and accept you as you are. I think I have this subconscious fear that that will someday disappear (and that’s why I always want to come back. To make sure that everything is still the same). After seeing how things are this summer, I can’t help but think what position I would have if I had worked the past 2 summers. Who knows I might actually be in charge of flying scotts.

My sunfish sail was cut short because of a quick forming storm. Can’t go to camp without having a thunderstorm pop out of no where. Totally ordinary. A day in the 100s is guaranteed to have a storm of some sort.

I left the gate feeling accomplished and so so happy that I had made the visit. I know now that people do care about me there (something that took awhile to achieve because I am an out of stater). I know that people want me to come back. I know that I made a difference. I know that camp is still camp no matter what. I know that I have been given strength to live out the camp message yet again. I know that CSF is the most amazing thing that ever happened to be as a kid. I know Camp will forever be in my heart.

Destination OBX - the point of no return

Well its been another short lapse of time but for good reason. Our lab crew headed out on Wednesday for overnight sampling. It had already been a full week. Tuesday and Wednesday Jane and I were left on our own to take care of business. This meant checking out the truck and driving myself to Hoop Hole to do fiddler crab and plant sampling.

It was a change of pace to be in charge of things. Certainly a sense of moving up the chain of command. Our work with fiddler crabs has officially started. They are hilarious creatures. AT low tide they come out of their burrows and move around the mudflats similar to herds moving across the prairies. In order to catch them, we set plastic jars at different positions in the marsh. As the tide comes in and t

he crabs move back to land, some of them end up falling in the containers. They are much more enjoyable than blue crabs because they are only a few centimeters in length and have only one large claw (males). Right now we are just trying to identify which species live in our marshes.

In between the 9 hour work days we were trying to keep track of the World Cup games…tuning into radio in the lab and screaming when the US amazingly scored in 90’. Landon Donovan is the man.

So after a full work day on Wednesday, we packed up our Silverado truck with a Canoe and all of our gear. Repeat….Canoe, 4 people, nets, coolers, buckets, etc…….Oh yes! The drive took us through rural coastal North Carolina. It is a unique region but has

plenty of character and natural beauty. I spent an hour staring at the window across marsh fields, at old cottages, run down houses, and southern

Americana. I always wonder what those people do for a living…..farming, fishing? It is such a different world than what I

live in each day. THe landscape is gorgeous though. Very similar to what you envision from Nicholas Sparks novels. Well that’s because this is where he based his books.

We reached Cedar Island at the tip of land before the Outer Banks. The main method of transportation is via ferry. The NC ferry system is fabulous and in most places free. The ride was 2 hours across the Pamilco Sound where pirates once lurked and civil war battles occurred. It is said that Blackbeard, and infamous pirate, was beheaded in these waters. At the very center of the trek you could not see any land. I looked off the railing into a horizon of sea and was drawn into a sense of infin

ite existence and tranquility. The sun was slowly setting on the horizon and the sun’s rays were beaming on the water. It was a picture perfect moment that I will hold forever as one of my favorites.

The ferry arrived in Ocracoke, a lovely seaside village comprising of small stores, local food, a lighthouse, and cottages (we stopped at Howard’s) The drive across the island is similar to what the Pensacola beach road looked like before Hurricane Ivan. At the end of the Island is another ferry. Waiting for departure, we walked along the beach and enjoyed a rising full moon.

The final ferry took us across another treacherous pass that, due to its shifting sandunes, was labeled the graveyard of the atlantic. The OBX are littered with shipwrecks of every sort. Our journey was a short

ride to Hatteras Inlet, the tip on the northern OBX. The IMS lab purchased a house on Hatteras for summer research. In general Hatteras is a popular destination for wealthy families to summer. The beach cottages are ENORMOUS. And most people also have large fishing yachts that they keep in the Hatteras marinas. Well as nice as it would have been to stay in the mansions, our property was a one story unfurnished house on the main road. It did the trick.

In the morning, we met up with a local who had agreed to take our equipment to our site via his skiff boat. Irony, we loaded the boat next to the Citation yacht which had won the Big Rock Fishing tournament in Morehead last week until they lost their 1 million dollar prize because of a license violation. Anyways, we road the boat to a small piece of land between the marina and the sound. Our job was to sein and set fyke nets like we had in all of our other sites. A sill is going to be added to the sound soon because it is failing victim to erosion. This was evident as Prafka and I found very little species in our nets.

After a sunny, hot, and buggy day on the job, we got to relax on the beach. Hatteras is also similar to Pensacola Beach but has MAJOR dunes. It is also a very windy area that is known for its surf and kiteboarding. Sure enough the kites were out. Something I would like to try sometime in my life. Looks like a blast. The waves were really intense today, as were the currents. And to my surprise, the water was much much colder than Atlantic Beach.

The evening involved another trip our to the site at 7pm. This time we launched a canoe and paddled across on

our own. The process was repeated at 2am but this time we had to retrieve the nets and then ID all of the species on the spot. Exhaustion quickly set in.

After a few hours of sleep we were up again to retreieve all of our gear and head back to the mainland. THe journey back took all day due to missed ferries. We spent 2 hours in Ocracoke walking around the shops. I was totally drained of energy and the 100 degree temperature only added to the fatigue. I thought I was going to fall over. But I couldn’t help looking in these stores an once again envisioning what I want to have in my own house someday. Note to self: go to ocracoke to purchase décor!

THe ferry ride involved lots of napping and eavesdropping on Mennonite women from Holland and a German couple on vacation in the OBX. That’s a first. We finally made it back home. I had a great time and certainly reminded myself of the beauty of the NC OBX. Someday I’d love to go on a really nice vacation to the area.

All I wanted to do was shower, eat, and sleep when I got back to my beach house. I was about the open the main door when……..the lock wouldn’t open. I tried and tried for 10 minutes, nothing. Seriously? I was so drained at this point. The door didn’t budge. Inevitably I ended up in a condo unit next door trying to call locksmiths. No one was open. No one else could get the door to open. Wonderful. I was so thankful when the people helping me offered me to join them for dinner. But I was so tense, tired, anxious, etc….that I probably was not the best company. I owe a HUGE thank you to Christina’s family for offering me a place to stay in their house. I gave up on my house for the night and drove through an intense lightening storm to Swansboro. Best shower I’ve had in awhile and an amazing place to literally crash. I slept so well and woke up to a beautiful sunrise. I really love their house. Once again the Kohlmann’s provided for me. I couldn’t stay for long because the locksmith was going to meet me at the house.

And the inevitable happened…..the door opened perfectly. Really? How embarrassing. I cant really explain what happened but I think the humidity from the storm last night caused the door to seal.

Home finally. (Only to be depressed again after the US lost the soccer game)